rainy days

SO, as I was crawling through my everlasting day today, I had a thought. WHAT IS WITH ALL THE STUPID HOMEWORK??? Or, for that matter, work in general. I mean, school teaches us the same amount, if not less, than we would otherwise be learning by exploring the world. I guess education is important, but it is kinda overtaking the average teenager's life.

Ah, well. Today is gray. Grey if you're in Britain. But, quite dark and dreary in general. The stupid xc league meet today was so annoying, yet so exciting at the same time. We like had to make sure we didn't get washed away by the water or blown away by the wind, and, on top of that, we had to run. Fast. Or at least I was supposed to. But I didn't, and finished like further back than I normally do. 7th (or, rather 8th) out of like 150 isn't too shabby. But I can do better. I've decided that Brookline people are way too fast for their own good.

Yes, other than that and the homework, nothin much goin on. So amazingly happy for the extra hour that I get to sleep tonight (and yesss, an extra hour of homework that I have to do tomorrow).

just saw the movie "hard candy". My parents looked at the title and thought it was porn. psh. I'd rather waste my time on some intellectual movie than be stupid like that. Well, hanyways, it was quite a good (and odd) movie. I really liked it.

anyways, my parents are yelling at me to go to bed

I should probably get to bed...

Sparknotes is my Savior

So, yes. So.....yes.

what is with Junior year??? I am drowning in work and feel like I should be able to get it all done, but noooo...I have to wait for the last minute and stay up till 2 in the freaking morning to finish my lab report. I guess that's just what's gonna happen this year. And, oh wow, an English test A-block tomorrow...shall be death to me.

And, so, yes, the other day, I did a 10 miler for the first time in like a while, and the last like 2 miles were absolutely terrible. I had a horrible stomach ache, and just like ran through it, but it wasn't a good idea. So, yeah, uhm, I'll spare you the details, but something bad happened, so I had to go to the doctors, and they gave me a blood test to test for stuff, but then ended up just like saying running is absolutely terrible for your body sometimes, and this is the way things go. So, yeah, I've gotta take a few days off from running, which would be sweet, but I feel like a total slacker as it is, not doing any real significant run since Saturday. Ah, well. Rest is good.

Hmmmm....archery club, or science team. Tough decision.

uh oh, here I go with the philosophy again....
It's quite sad. In a way, I'm not the kind of person who would walk up to someone and chat with them and impress them. I want to know how they feel about me. So, yes, one of my absolutely horrible strategies to figure out what someone thinks of me is kinda ignoring them, acting like myself (ish) around them, and seeing whether they like who I am or not/how they react. Basically, I want to know how they feel about me, because asking people straight up could be awkward/lead to a forced answer. I know, it's quite a horrible way to live life, but it sometimes works. But generally doesn't. And it pretty much sucks. And I want to change, but I can't. It's all good.

Wow, why is it that teenagers think so much about this stuff when it doesn't really matter now. I mean, nothing now will really change anything in the future.

SO, yes, tomorrow=friday=good. I can't wait for the weekend. No, actually, I can't wait till I'm finished with PSATs Saturday morning. That's gonna be quite annoying.

Maybe I should go to practice tomorrow, to have something to look foreward to (yesss...track workout...only crazy people look foreward to that)

But, till then
SLEEEP

schweet, 50th post

Trip to Maine at the end of Summer

Wow, I have D block free now and am quite bored. So, I am being quite awesome and posting from school. (well, actually, just posting from home becasue the school computers are stupid and don't allow me to do things like this, but anyways, I'm writing it here)

I’ve decided that I hate frees. For the past like two years, I’ve been working like so amazingly hard. I’ve been getting mediocre grades in classes, and have always been scared that I would become one of those kids who like is horrible at school and not going to college etc, etc. Well, not to say I am one of those kids, but 6 frees per week seems very odd. It seems like I am like slacking off and not working hard enough.

*librarian walks by*

So, yes.

People have been quite frustrating in the last week. I really need to just like calm down and like stop being absolutely awkward. Wow, I hate communication. I need to realize that there's a lot more to life than thinking about it. And, wow, speaking of a life, I really need to get one. Now I'm actually trying to.

But, yeah, nothing else uber exciting. Amazing Paddy's Pub race this weekend, which I cannot wait for, even though I'm not supposed to run Sunday 'cause coach thinks it'll tire me out for the big meet Tuesday, but not like I matter in like placing at all. Ah, well. Basically, I can't wait for the weekend.

Sooo...nothin much else. Gotta do a mountainload of homework....sweet

It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

lately nuthin much going on...same old, same old...school+running+homework=my life. Pretty sad. Ok, so now I'm just like wasting time trying to think of something to say. Hmmmmmmmm...

So, yes, my parents came home the other day from "parents night" and were all freaking out about how much work I have (and will have) this school year. Neither of my parents took many AP courses in High School (well, pretty much 'cause they like didn't offer them back then), so they were really surprised when three of my teachers told them that the AP classes I was in were the equivalent to a college course. So, all in all, quite exciting, and they like convinced my to drop Latin. Well, not really convinced, but more liked pushed me over the edge, seeing that I'm not really enjoying it anyways. So, yes, now I have at least one free every day (yesssss), and am going to have like mad time to do my homework.

Hmmm...trying to think of something meaningful...I have recently (re)discovered a few of the best songs ever, hence the title of this post, and am listening to them like non-stop. It's pretty crazy to think that I didn't really listen to music before last year, but now I'm like always carrying my ipod around everywhere. It's quite sad, now that I think about it.

But, yes, it seems to be getting more like fall now, unfortuanetely. It is way to cold. Or, at least, it is much, MUCH colder than Summertime, and I have not yet gotten myself used to the winter temperature yet. So, yeah, running in cold weather is really no fun. I guess the shirtless running season has come to a close.

It's quite odd. The way things have been going on nowadays. Sort of like...I think way too much. I think about things I shouldn't. You see, most people (especially teenagers) are going up and down hills. Lives are torn apart, then stitched back together again. Whatever happens, life will go on, and you gotta get yourself back together again. Not that I would know. Wow, the mistakes I've made which I never will forgive nor forget. But at least I know I made mistakes. That's what the future's for. Life is all about the ups and downs.



But...yeah....uhmmm...I've decided I'm quite awkward in conversation. Other than written ones. With myself. But, yeah, trying to start a conversation with anyone has been very difficult for me the past days. I've had a lot of awkward silences, and have just been coming up blank on what to talk about. SO amazingly awkward. Not that it matters. It's all good.

So, yes, maybe off to bed? An amazing load of homework (including several papers, and tests, due Tuesday). So, pretty much, other than apple-picking with teh family and, of course, running, I'm pretty much goin to do homework for the rest of my life. It's all good (wow, I say that way too often)

off to do...something...
bye